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Friday 29th of July 2005 09:53:46 AMChinese females want American white guys only:
I'm writing this response only because I want to respond to a message posted by a Chinese guy who had made comments stemming from his frustration utter disgust in Chinese females who have admitted to likely ONLY White American males because the think it looks "classy."
This is a somewhat long note, but PLEASE bear with me.
I'd love to share my opinion with that guy because he really seemed "hurt" emotionally. First, I must let you know a little about myself. I am American-born. Because my blood consists of black, Indian( Native American) and caucasian I have an interest in a variety of cultures and I have had friends of different races in America. I admit, however, that most of my acquaintences and friends in work, school and personal life have been caucasian and I am aware of some realities about "White American" beliefs and feelings that may not be shared with other ethnicities.
I have an extremely open mind and I do not get offended easily when others share their true opinions about race, interracial topics, religion or politics. My like for conversing with, learning about and sharing with others puts me in a unique and interesting position.
I have been studying Chinese language, script, history etc, alone for the last three years and plan to all my life. I find almost anything Chinese fascinating and have ever since I was very young. My five year old daughter even studies with me.
I understand the Chinese man's frustration and I have often heard the comments of white guys and their opinions about people or females of other races, ethnicities and why some like to date certain type of females. I have also witnesses first-hand, Asian females (as well as others) make comments that re-inforces the angry Chinese man's fear that many (but, obviously, NOT all) Chinese-American females yound and old wish to "drop" or forget their origins and shun men (or women) of similar or same origin.
It hurts my heart to read that angry man's note because one message he wrote to those type of females stated, " ...face it, we're yellow, we have flat noses and scrawny bodies You are Chinese!"
I know I am not Chinese, but I know that it is easy to slowly begin to believe that may be being a white American male really is the best thing. Watching white American guys in film and media slowly begins to eat away at your pride and confidence, especially when certain females become to believe the American male body and fashion it the only thing to desire.
I "study" people and their behavior. During the last twenty years, I have really noticed a sad, sad trend with Chinese males losing their culture and ignoring their origin to be liked and respected. But, Please, Please, Please don't let yourselves forget what an AWESOME race of people you are! Although people are not perfect, YOU CHINESE have been the greatest influence to the West and North America.
I LOVE Chinese. I would like to remind those certain girls that THEIR Chinese men have some of (if not, the most) intellegent and awesome minds of all human beings. YOUR blood can be traced back to several thousand years of GENIUS!! I love the intelligence, the mind-power, the will-power, the creativity, the genius, the competence, the determination, the drive, the artistic nature, the wisdom and the over-all genius mind that makes the Chinese!
To all clueless women, just remember that your white America would not be as "cool" as it is today if it were not greatly, in part of, the Chinese. I bet you Chinese men did not realize just how much the very fabric of American life, culture, art, math, ideas and will-power has been "interwoven" so beautifully thanks to the Chinese.
You make up so much of the foundation substance of America the land where everyone wants to live because it is "so cool", according to some people. Thanks to help from cultures like YOURS it is indeed a very interesting and fascinating place. My childhood consists of the coolest memories related to Chinese. I admit I loved my Kung Foo theater weekends; However, I realize that some feel those types of things seem stereotypical. To me as a young kid back then, though it was something deeper that went beyond just a "karate" movie (for example obviously not everyone Asian does Karate and so on).
I bet you never knew just how far your influences have reached. You would never hear from the average white american male how much Chinese values and will-power, determination and insistence on excellence as touched the hearts and minds of many little black American kids in the "ghettos" throughout the years. I have witnessed many, many of them study posters and film and other media depicting the Chinese man's will-power to gain what they will need to make a "strong" life for themselves. Believe me, no kid really wants to live on welfare in the ghetto for the rest of his life. Some of them just have not been given a good chance to show thier intelligence (But they are learning to beat those odds more now).
Anyway, I just want to let those certain girls be reminded of how much their "white guys" are cool partly because of years of influence from other cultures. Also, remember, I have TONS of white guy friends, and believe me when I tell you that very often, while you are thinking it is "classy" to be with them, Many (NOT ALL) are telling me and my White TRUE BLOOD American girls that they just want to see if your types are as horny and easy-going, and MAN- PLEASING as you are in the movies!! (You know, "me love you long time!)
You Asian chicks are very beautiful, but please don't ignore "your own". It is okay to have TRUE love with another race, but don't forget how awesome your lineage is. American can not afford to lose that AWESOME CHINESE BLOOD and and cool Chinese guys. Besides, I think alot of Chinese guys are hot.
My intentions of developing more friendships with members of the diverse Asian community are innocent, honest, sincere and justifiable. My journney to familiarize my self with the Mandarin form of the Chinese language, script,histories, logic and it's origins has led me to various internet sites which I use a mere supplement to gather additional information. While doing so I have joined forums and have discovered how much I have stereotyped a members of a culture of which I have had no know real and tangible exposure. I've been happy to realize certain things, but am also embarrassed of the ignorance and naivete I still possess regarding other people. Although I still stand by the statements I have made above, I, at least now, am able to admit my ignorance and proceed to gain knowledge and grow.
In addition, I've recently encountered a term I never existed in the Asian community as others have shared experiences. With that said.....NO, this is not Asiaphilia!!! Perverts out there are screwing up other's opportunity to learn more about eachother so that we can grow peacefully and productively as a human race. So be aware , but not paranoid!!!
Thursday 01st of September 2005 06:28:20 PM
Kan bare istemme dette.
And I just have to say: Im sick and tired of Holywood WASP movies. (and why is this imposed on us inocent foreigners?)
I Love yiz so much too.The_Warrior
Friday 02nd of September 2005 11:00:10 PM
Just want to add my 2 cents.
I am a Chinese guy who is very proud of my roots.
I think many people just are ignorant and cannot be bothered with history (We can learn a lot from history). Many rely on the media and unfortunately the media is somehow biased in America towards the whites. As in any media in other countries. I remember watching a lot of Hong Kong films and TV shows and seeing all the various Asian roles make me feel good about myself. I get to learn a lot of Asian values and cool Asian things that I will never see in Western films. And I felt Asians are dignified in the shows. Now I watch Asian shows almost exclusively and boycotted Hollywood since 2 years ago.
You see, people are brought up to be proud of the country in which they grew up. I know a German who loves everything German (even their girls) and ignores anything non-European because they can't be bothered. Chinese who live all around the world see the world as global village. Most of us keep ourselves informed with the situation of other Chinese in other countries and at the same time learn about other cultures. Not always, but hey if you migrated to another country, you want to make it your home and assimilate.
However, I don't want my future generation to become part of an ignorant group of a people who have inferiority (which leads to superiority) complex. Hence, they step on and ridicule other races. I decide to move back to Asia where my kids will live a normal life. Why? Because I want them and my future generations to grow up with Asian values and spirit. They will have all the direction and motivation they need to succeed in their life. Life may be tough in Asia. But I don't see how much easier it will be for them here.
Friday 02nd of September 2005 11:08:09 PM
Also I disagree about your title.
There are many American Chinese females (and males too) who went to Hong Kong and Taiwan and succeeded in show biz. They have the talent but the country in which they grew up want them to play stereotypical roles. This is just an example that there are many strong American Asian females out there who knows what is going on and know that they don't have to kowtow to ignorant people.
Saturday 12th of November 2005 06:25:13 PMi agree witht the original post:
Amen to that bro. i am too very fascinated with asian cultire. Iam from the west indies, and also venezuelan. i live in the united states, but besides that being the point, even though im not a full blooded american i can say that the asian culture is very rich. I dont know what draws me close to them, but i enjoy having conversations with orientals and i also enjoy learning to speak there language and there art, as well as the food they eat. i dream of visiting places like china, japan,cambodia,philipines,indonesia just to name a few, just to take notes do research and have fun. Im not rascist like most ppl are these days. Its a fine time to open up your eyes and see whats out there in the world instead of always looking at your front door and back yard everyday. There is a lot more to see, and i intend to see it! Actually, my goal is too marry an asian woman. Why? Cuz they are the best women, i think and i can learn from her. id say your culture is fascinating and eye catching, and attractive! I love your craftsmanship, and your architecture.......very unique and genius. su_wan
Tuesday 11th of July 2006 07:39:39 PM
I am a Chinese girl though I have been living in Australia/New Zealand for over 12 years, I am still proud of my roots. I travel around the World, and have dear friends from all over, but I have never forgetten about my origin. Chinese culture is deep and rich. Western culture is modern and exciting. I like to think that I have got the best of both Worlds. Maybe some Chinese feels like to mimic others, but to me and my friends, we love to be who we are. gzqgzq
Sunday 30th of July 2006 01:38:09 PM
In fact, sometimes chinese females doesn't like white guy, but sometimes forginers in china are always like a rich man. chinese people loves money, all over the world 's people loves money too, so, you can see some females say:"I love you! " to some white guys, but she doesn't really love that white guy...I live in china, I know them, it's not good, but...who doesn't love money? so , maybe we can't say they are bad women, but 's a real deal, we can't change it. That's it!~~netfish
Monday 30th of October 2006 09:58:55 AMOk, i appreciate your intention:
Hi, i see you write this article with good intention, but try not to use "you guys" to include all chinese. I think both that chinese girl and the way the chinese guy critized her are stupid! and definitely they are not representative of well-educated chinese in anyway.
another thing a "karate" movie (for example obviously not everyone Asian does Karate and so on) might be what you call kungfu movie in US. but Karate is the Japanese version of kongfu, which they learnt and adapted from Chinese Tang dynasty. (kara means empty and is also the kunyomi for Tang in Japanese.) Anyway, i have to admit that Japan did distill and package well certain chinese culture and promote them well to the west, despite what they did in WWII, credit should still be give.
I am also living in shenzhen sometimes, i kind of agree that it also boils down to "money" while talking about women looking for men. it's been inthe gene for thousands of years. There are also lot of Eastern European women coming to southern and major chinese cities (HK,Macao, Beijing, shanghai)for men. There isn't anything inherited good or bad about being white. we are all human being after all.dutchie
Thursday 23rd of November 2006 05:27:52 PM
I agree with the starter of this topic. Having worked in Zhuhai and Shanghai for 4 years now i noticed that (especially in Shanghai) more and more women tend to find it fashionable to date white guys. Do they prefer the American caucasians?? Definately. For instance when i go to a bar or public place and when i'm able to strike up a conversation with a local girl one of the first questions she will ask me is "What is your nationality??" I normally would not lie about that and tell her that i'm Dutch. More often then not i will notice some kind of disappointement and after that most will lose interest. I probably look like the steriotypical American to many Chinese (whatever that may be) I'm quite tall (6.3 ft) square chin, muscular and short cut and blond. I don't know why they prefer the Americans over the Europeans even though i asked many Chinese girls, but it has (in my opinion) something to do with the american culture being perceived as the best etc.
Many Caucasians think that when they go to an asian country like China all the girls will line up to become their gf, in my experience that is not true. It is quite hard to find a nice and honest girl here who doesn't have a hidden agenda. Even for a goodlooking and young and fit white guy it can still be hard. A percentage of the women that look for white guys do so because they wanna improve their social status/wealth and prospects. Another group (real groupies) want white guys cos they think white guys are knights in shining armour who will marry them and after that all will be blish. There is also a substantial group who chases white guys for the illusive greencard. The best group are the educated and succesfull girls a small percentage of whom want white guys because they think they can have a more equal relationship etc with them. Many of the women from this last group are a bit older and have unsuccesfull relationships or even marriages with Chinese behind them.
In my opinion Chinese guys can rest assured. By far and large most chinese girls still prefer (or even only want) a Chinese husband. There are many reasons why most Chinese girls would never or almost never even consider dating white guys. The best and most succesful and nicest chinese girls i have met were without exception girls who only wanted and only did date Chinese guys.
Some people, especially white caucasians think Chinese girls vastly prefer white guys over black guys. In my opinion this is not true. It is not that they don't like black guys but more that they are scared and shy to date and walk with black guys because they fear the reactions they will get from other chinese people, not in the last place their family and friends. Dating a white guy is also still frowned upon by many but dating a black guy would be even more not done. If you go to Singapore you will often notice that especially the black guys there can really be the center of attention of large groups of Chinese Singaporian girls. The same think is true for Japan, where the girls are becoming more and more liberated by the day.
ONe last thing. The former one child policy has had some demographic effects for the younger generations. It has caused a slight imbalance in the gender ratio because many chinese couples decided they prefered a boy over a girl. Sadly the society has always put more value in boys than girls and this has caused forced (sex selective) abortions. This means that there are more young males in China looking for a female then vice versa. We now see a growing number of young chinese males who are looking over the border to try to find a girl.Former_Member
Friday 29th of June 2007 11:28:50 AMWow:
That was a very well-written topic, and I have to say that on most aspects, I agree.
The culture of China is very interesting and I myself would like to learn more about it.
People of all races should take pride in their heritage, but not have an overabundance of it.
Lately i have heard many people (Most Asiannot all Chineseand some not) that a large amount of Asian girls are seeking white-American guys. But think of it from a different point of view. maybe some white- American girls desire Asian guys. White girls have a right to complain just as much as any Asian man who is angry because "Asian girls do not gravitate toward their male counterparts",
because Asian men usually do not look toward white women.
Just an observation.easytiger
Tuesday 17th of July 2007 11:28:55 PM
I totally agree vera, as an Englishman with a strong history and culture i prefer to read about chinese culture and really want to learn the language.
Kan bare istemme dette.
And I just have to say: Im sick and tired of Holywood WASP movies. (and why is this imposed on us inocent foreigners?)
I Love yiz so much too.
edited to fix misplaced html tag - Joemy9988jw
Thursday 26th of July 2007 12:40:43 AMlearn english:
i am a Chinaman, and have learned english for years. To futher improve my English speaking and listenging ability, I want to make friends, via internet, with some english native speakers. But, there is no such thing as "nothing for something". Therefore, I want to find some guys who want to learn chinese. So, we can teach each other and improve together. This is my primary purpose.
Thursday 26th of July 2007 11:47:50 AM
Wow! Hi my9988jw! I would love to help you with English and I would love to learn Chinese! I have sent you a PM and an email about it! :)
Talk to you soon.
Tuesday 19th of February 2008 11:08:44 PMmy original post:
Wow, you know, I have not been on this site for a long long time. I googled my name on the net just to see what came up and this thread did. I usually post at MM.com
I am glad to see alot of people agreed with my post. I have learned a LOT more since that original posteven the fact that the "love" of "all things China" is often media-produced. Never-the-less, being a mixed race non-Asian female, there are even more deeper and personal things that I have discovered in my life that are shared by many Asian Americans, especially men.
Take care and thanks for being so nice and receptive of my post.
It's kind of embarrassing now, though, as read it again. Boy, I used alot of stereotypical language. Yikes Return to the CHINA Archive
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